Yesterday, the phone rings and I pick it up 'cause my moms painting all the way over in the guest house. I see the caller ID first and it's a NY location, but for some reason it didn't regester in my mind as someone on the Varello side. [A.K.A: My Moms side] Anyway, it's my Mom's brother, Buddy. And, y'know, I expect him to be stand offish and rude like he has been to me for the past 16 years of my life, but as soon as he begins to talk, I notice a dramatic difference in his general tone. It's pleasent and he even stretches as far as to joke around with me a bit. I react the only way I know how, I joke back of course. Eventually, kind of puzzled, I find my mom and giver her the phone because he asks for her. Apparently, my face expressed how confused I am, because my mom looks concerened when I hand her the phone. I go back to the kitchen and sit down to think about it. Why it would change n all...
Then I remembered back to this summer at my grandmother Vera's funeral when I was standing at the edge of her open grave. Uncle Buddy kind of wandered up beside me.
There was this long long awkward, but normal silence. I mean, it's not like we ever really talked or anything, yet, for some reason, this silence was different. I thought maybe it was just 'cause it was at a funeral, so it's more solemn and respectful, with less tension between us because of that. But it wasn't like that at all.
It was a peaceful silence.
Kind of like, an un-spoken truce.
Since some people said the conflict between my mom and the rest of the family is the real reason Vera died.
So maybe they finially gave up fighting because they see the result of the arguements and the shunning and the yelling and the hitting and the exile.
Or maybe they finially gave up fighting because there was no grandmother around anymore to pick her 'favorite' children.
Whatever the reason is, Buddy talked to me. And not only that, apologized. He was the first one to break the silence that day though. Not looking at me, still looking down at his mom, he said "I'm sorry for all the things you've had to hear in this family. And I'm sorry for what you've seen, too. Anything I've said to you, I take back now. I've been meaning to apologize for a long long time." He was crying. Of course. So I decided to initiate a hug. And he hugged back. It was weird at the time, but now, I wish I said something more than "It's okay."
Then later, at his house when I was in the basement kinda baby-sitting the younger cousins of mine, he called me over to the cellar door. He said he wanted me to help him move things and to watch out for all the dust. But he really gave me some paitings that my mom had done when she was my age. They were so beautiful and I was really touched that he would give these to me. Unfortunately, Buddy's not the type to be all, sentimental, so when I said thank you, he didn't say anything. But he didn't need to.
I had to rush to the car and hide then from my mom until we got to the airport that day 'cause I knew she'd turn the car around and drive all the way back to Komack to give him back the paintings.
She's just modest like that.
Buddy did say that he would apologize to me, but never to his sister [my mother] because, and I quote, "...she's a stubborn ass...sometimes." And the fact that he added a sometimes in there, I knew he, in fact, did apologize to her. My mom later confirmed my thoughts.
I don't know why I wrote about this day.
I mean- it's memorable, but it's not like me to write 'bout it.
I will never write a post this long ever again.